Can I Marry Someone I’m Not Attracted To?

So I’m excited about us starting this new segment here and I guess your response determines if it’s here to stay or not (don’t worry there would still be stories).
I’ve had people tell me they aren’t attracted to a person and therefore can’t consider him or her as a partner, talk less of a potential partner. 
What is the basis of attraction? 
Is physical attraction so important when it comes to making a choice of a spouse?
As Christians can we just get married and let the attraction come in little by little? Or it wouldn’t come at all?
I await your responses. Let’s talk it out👍 Please share with friends as well.



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Temitope Ogunyinka, is a loving, caring and friendly person. She is passionate about impacting the world through timeless wisdom and knowledge found in her thought provoking stories and writing that applies to all ages. Her stories and articles cut across love, relationship and romance in a way that does not deny the relevance of God in our everyday life. She is a devoted christian, passionate about bringing people to the knowledge of God’s true and unfailing love.


  1. There has to be something about that person you like to say yes to him even if you do not feel you are in love with him. I believe Love grows its not instant with the heart racing. Overtime you will come to care deeply about them if the person is caring.

  2. It depends on the type of attraction o! You can be attracted to someones mind, personality, face, voice, feet, fingers, eyes, B & B… anything. An attraction might not lead to marriage cos just because a food smells nice does not mean it is sweet. Have you heard people say ‘This girl is fine o but her mouth is very bad’?

    Anyway, in my opinion you cannot judge a book by its cover but if the book is not attractive you might not bother to see what is under the cover. I think everyone should be reasonably attracted to their spouse but that should not be the only reason to get married.

  3. Physical attraction matters especially to the persons in question cos what one may find attractive might not be same for another. Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder as they say. And like RJ says it should not be the only reason but it should be present.

  4. Akua’s statement hit home for me. There has to be something, be it physical or in character, that initially catches your attention. Even the gospel is initially “attractive” in itself, with the purest of motives of just wanting to know more about and connect more to this good God.

  5. Well to me attraction matters a lot. There has to be something that got my attention in the first place, it doesn’t necessary has to be physical beauty. There has to be something I saw that makes me wanna consider getting married to you.

    You don’t just wake up and say you wanna marry someone, I believe there has to be some chemistry prior to that.

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