It got to a time in my walk with God were I was confident in all the Holy Spirit had told me about God, and part of this was I believed every believer had a great destiny in Christ if only they let Him guide their steps (I still do by the way).
I also began to think as myself as one to change one’s perception by force. Now, I believe that as a genuine believer there are basic truths you should know and if you don’t know the devil will take advantage of your ignorance. I discovered there were less bible studying believers and more ‘my pastor says believer’. Now don’t get me wrong, your pastor is to help guide your spiritual growth but not to become a replacement for a one on one relationship with God.
In the book of acts the bible specified that when Paul preached in Berea where the bible recorded ( Acts 17:11) as he spoke the people examined for their selves the scriptures to see if this things were so.
Acts 17:11 (KJV) These were more noble than those in Thessalonica, in that they received the word with all readiness of mind, and searched the scriptures daily, whether those things were so.
Also there is the fact of (Hebrews 8:10-12) which says He will put His spirit in us all from the greatest to the smallest so that no one will say know thy God for all will know God, for themselves. There were also several other scriptures that emphasized spiritual growth in the church based on the knowledge of the truth.
This surprised me and I set out to begin to debunk some things that I felt where wrong but in a ‘I know more than this person kind of way’. It was more out of ‘I’m more knowledgeable’ than actually out of love; knowledge puffs up but love edifies. So I became this guy in the meeting that felt he had to teach everyone, to be honest this approach did some good but at the same time did harm because little did I know that the seed of pride was being sown.
Sometimes in church I would switch off because the message is too simple, No Rhema like I used to call it. I really began to downsize most pastors because I believed they knew little and preached more from experience than the word of God. I complained instead of praying for them out of love.
Although I had ministers I listened to, on rare occasions I felt since I’m this good I should know all with the Holy Spirit teaching me. Also, from the little ministration I did I saw a lot of results so I felt yeah I had arrived and at that point I began to ask myself if that if that was all Christianity had to offer then I was already there.
Porn crawled into my life back then as a 10 or 11 year old and over the years had been a companion, one I relied on in times past when I was frustrated about anything or needed something to quench the lust my body craved for.
So when I became a born again Christian something had to be done, but unfortunately this was a difficult task physically. It had been my refuge for so long . . . something I thought I found peace in when everything around me was getting irritating.
After my encounter this began to be a big problem as porn was eating into my time, it was basically a waste of time. So I started fasting and praying about this, and later on I got some acquaintances to help but . . . Well it was still prominent.
Later on I found myself questioning my faith because how can I have the life of God and still continue in Sin? The solution came.
Firstly, I had to come to terms that this behaviour is not of the new creation.
Secondly, I had to start looking at myself at all times from the light of the scriptures, meaning my situations do not describe me but Gods word did, so I had to renew my mind.
Thirdly, I had to constantly continue my journey in Christ; looking at him constantly and not giving porn the attention it needed. With time, porn began to lose its spiritual hold as I paid attention to meditating on the word of God instead of meditating on the Sin which is Porn.
I also discovered that as porn lost its hold, it now became something of a habit that my brain switches on at sometimes in the day, I continued this remedy of paying attention to his word, no matter the amount of times I fell I got up again and continued my walk with God. With time again porn became a thing of choice and then finally it stopped being suggested. That was it. Years of this thing annoying me left, not many people knew about this as I shared with only a few people and encouraged them to pray for me.
– I learnt that God wants us to share spiritual knowledge with one another, but this should be done in Love and not trying to display an arrogance because of our level of knowledge.
– Love takes note of the time, place, situation and to some extent, even the ego of the person or people we share with. I discovered it’s not only about the display of Gods power and knowledge but the display of the act of Love to our neighbours; for it is through this we plant His seed in their hearts which then the Holy Spirit takes over and works with.
– I learnt that the struggle I had required both a spiritual and physical effort attached to it’s winning me over; so I tried to keep myself busy. When the suggestion comes, I do something more profitable. I don’t stay in a situation where I can ultimately end up giving such thought a fighting chance and that’s how porn was dealt with.
The final part of my story would be posted next-week. In the meantime care to share whatever trials or struggles you have faced in your journey with Christ? Please feel free to do so in the comment section below or send me an email and I would respond.
Seun Ajia enjoys writing, discussing and reading about who we are in christ, the totality of all He has promised and what we have inherited in him. He also has an Msc in Accounting and Finance. You could reach him via email [email protected]
Check out the excerpt of the new series here
Also, there would be a singles hangout with movies and discussion on ‘wisdom for the not yet married’. It would be holding in Lagos. Interested peeps should reach me via email, [email protected]
I was there last year and had loads of fun…met other great ladies. Hope to see you there 🙂