The Husband Checklist

Hey guys! Yes, we all have checklists for the kind of spouse we want. I mean… it helps us know if we’re on the right track or not… right? Well here’s another article by ‘Beniboba on her checklist for a husband. Enjoy!


I think it is so easy for us as single Christians to set up really high, unrealistic standards. We want a good guy because we get messages from Church and other Christians not to settle for less, or one who doesn’t meet our standards. We also get messages from the world that we should wait for the perfect guy. Our perfect Prince to take us off into the sunset, to live happily ever after (and we’ve gotten these ever since we were little, if, like me, you watched Disney princess movies in your childhood).

So, with all these messages, it’s hard to remember that we aren’t going to marry a perfect man. He will have weaknesses, he will sin, he will do things to hurt us and we will do things that hurt him. Our marriage won’t be perfect, but it will help us grow in our sanctification.  Even though we know this, sometimes it’s hard not to have unrealistic expectations.

I remember when a family friend asked me a while ago about the type of man I wanted to marry, and  with a smile on my face I started listing them. Some of the many things I said were:

– Tall (the one that I won’t be taller than me no matter how high the heels of my shoes are)

– Rich (this cannot be over emphasized),
– Handsome (of course!)

– God fearing (as a Christian I won’t want otherwise)

– Can cook (more than Indomie and egg)
– Romantic and loves to buy me gifts

– Has good leadership skills

– Plays a musical instrument (like the saxophone)


I didn’t even think about what I was going to offer that person, or if I met their own check-list! Having an idea of what you are looking for in a significant other is great! It means you actually took time be honest with what you’re really looking for in a relationship. But if I am really honest with you, I think there is something more important than a check-list and you can guess what it is? It’s who YOU are called to be first.

Focus on becoming the right person before looking for the right person. Everybody wants to find their future spouse, but what we all need to understand is the importance of being set in our personal identity. If not, your relationship might turn into a relationship wreck. If you know all you know about yourself now, will you get married to yourself? Next question is who are you? What attractive qualities do you have to attract a spouse. How prepared for marriage are you?

God is more focused on who you’re becoming than who you marry. Turn the focus of your heart to God before trying to gain the love of someone else.
Putting God first can never be over-emphasized, it is always the way to go. He will never lead you wrong. As Psalm 105:4 says “ Seek the Lord, and his strength: seek his face evermore”. Forget the husband check-list and become the check-list.

What checklist do you have that you feel seems unrealistic? Would love to hear from you! Please leave a comment below. Thanks!

★ Bible Quote for the Day:
‘Cause me to hear Your loving kindness in the morning, for on You do I lean and in You do I trust. Cause me to know the way wherein I should walk, for I lift up my inner self to You.’
Psalm 143:8 (AMP)


‘Beniboba is an accountant but she’s very curious about a lot of things from food,  photography, fashion, people , books and most recently…. Her hair.



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Temitope Ogunyinka.

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